Chapter 64 - Short Freedom

Hi. Finally my final exam ended. Out of 5 courses, I had to sit for 4 papers. The first one like hell, but the rest was quite okay. Thank to God. Im not trying to brag, but I did get out early on every paper this semester. It's just my policy to not to sit wondering for unknown answer. Soon as I finished answering questions that I can (betol salah, pedulik je), aku akan goreng je soalan2 yg x dapat dijawab, angkat tangan dan hantar kertas jawapan. Masa keluar tu control macho sket sbhb confirm ramai akan angkat kepala dan tengok org yang keluar awal.
Supposely, my fellow class mate ada tradisi lepas final paper. Kitorang akan gi makan fastfood. Sounds boring right? but that's the only time I can spend with them. This semester, aku meneruskan tradisi ni, cuma bertiga saje. Boring.

Lepas ni bleh pening kepala pikirkan pasal tempat praktikal. Haram betol tmpt yg aku mintak ni. Bleh dia hilangkan application form aku. Patutla aku menunggu sebulan tanpa jawapan. Nak marah x bleh. Resubmit dan buat bodoh je la. I'm not in position to bargain and demand. I'm just going to try to apply for a place where I can experience the boring white colar job. Elaun entah ada entah tidak. Kira kasi panas la diorang yg mengerah tenaga tapi x berbayar. Sama2 la aku ngan colleague mengutuk bakal tempat praktikal kami yg x bagi elaun (walau aku masih x confirm tempat, tapi buat2 ada).

Baru lepas main futsal ngan kengkawan. Ingat nak lepas tensen, tapi makin berbukit tensen. Dah la main x cukup korum (a.k.a x cukup star). Sebab berkongsi court ngan mamat futsal yg x dikenali, kitorang dipelawa main bersama. Haram team aku macam kayu. Bukan nak kata aku C.Ronaldo atau busuk2 pon Park Ji Sung, tapi memang aku boleh main. Kena hanjing ngan mamat futsal tu. Tercalar betol ego aku. Kena bubuh la jugak. Argh Tension aku!! Balik main Winning Eleven ngan Midi pon kitorang kena bubuh dek River Plate. Baik aku tido.

Chapter 63 - I'm Only Human

Helo. Im starting my exam campaign tomorrow. Though i've got ample time to study, I wasted it on games, tvs and cartoons. Damn! With unsettled practical place, I just cant find myself at peace. Nasihat pada semua.... study la sementara masa masih ada. Last minute study sucks dan serabutkan kepala otak.

Tiada apa yang mustahil di dunia ni melainkan menghidupkan yang mati, so please someone...create a damn time machine so I can go back and change everything. Man, there's so much I want to change. Kembalinya ke masa silam, aku akan cari dan bunuh orang yg create time machine ni pastu aku akan jadi the new age nostradamus yg mempunyai prophecy until year 2006. Bet on all winning teams...basket ke, bola ke, football ke, kuda ke....pastu jadi billionaire hasil dari duit haram tu dan enjoy my life to the fullest. At the same time, Im gonna be a politician. Climb the stairs to the top and have Malaysia in my hand. Instead of having menara berkembar petronas, I'll build menara berkembar tiga. With wealth, health, power and chicks... I can't ask for anything else.

Chapter 62 - Teach Me

Just finished presented one of my final project. A burden lifted, but there's still some more... Nak cerita, bebudak kelas aku sume cuak ngan lecturer sorang ni. Nak kata makan orang tu x la... tapi kejam la jugak. Dengan muka yg tiada perasaan, dia boleh mengungkapkan, "kelakarnya...." pada bebudak satu masa dulu. Ironi....... Antara quote kengkawan aku...

"Aku rasa cam kat sekolah balik....kalau x siap homework kena berdiri atas kerusi...." - Ahmar.

"Kawan aku cakap, dia ni anak emak" - Hahnis.
Aku tanya balik, "Mana ko tau?".
Jawab Hahnis, "Sebab dia pakai inai."
"Bangangnya ngko...", jawab hati kecilku.

"Dia tu psycho la, aku x suka sangat dia ajar, bla...bla...bla..." - Rohzita.
"Tapi subjek dia aku dapat A", sambungnya lagi....
"Pehal lu minah nak komplen.....", jawab aku dalam hati...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To those who may concern.... I'm trying to trash all my housemate and if possible, my neighbours in Winning Eleven. But the developer just wont make it easy for me. Kenapa susah sangat nak placing untuk menanduk bola.






















































Get the picture.....

Chapter 61 - Look, I've Found A Moron!

Yesterday, I was surfing the Internet. Looking for solution for my PC problem. Apparently, at every boot, my XP will display something about "Sembako-cgvjlni.exe missing". I immediately recognize that this is some kind of virus. So I went searching in Yahoo! and clicked on the most top link available. Guess what I found? A moron.

Spot anything moronic? You might not see it as the picture might be bit small. Let me enlarge it.

What's up with that, jackass? Unfortunately, this fellow is from M'sia an one of the thing that I pitied M'sia is for having this idiot running freely in this peace nation....

Anyway, what's that suppose to mean? Are all M'sian stupid like you? Don't get me wrong, I don't give a shit if you want to be an idiot, but don't drag others in your obsession of "look... i'm stupid" thingy. Anyway, wasnt "sorry for my broken english" is enough? Just for your info, not all geeks, computer nerds as well as tech support coming from the United State, your imaginary state of perfect english and bullshit; but most of them are from around the world... Brasil, Philiphine, France, Korea.. you name it. Try reading their articles and you understand how broken some of them can be.

I wish your PC infected by unremoval virus that make you PC unable to reboot; so you cannot log into Internet and write crap. Anyway, what's NHFTech? Some kind of homo code?

Chapter 60 - I'm Cool

Now, people are talking and furious about harga minyak. Apparently, harga minyak seliter naik lagi. Bukan 2-3 cents, tapi 30 cents. Though, I'm one of the sufferer (Aku pakai keta maa...), I'm not in a mood to argue. It's understandable. M'sia afterall the 2nd cheap after Brunei. Xleh fight la Brunei. Rakyat x ramai, syarikat minyak derang adalah milik rakyat. Even goyang kaki pun rakyat derang ada share dalam syarikat minyak tu. *Dont correct me even if I'm wrong, I'm a proud person. Still, xde mood nak argue walaupun byk bende nak cakap. Sekarang ni aku lebih mengelak dari fikir banyak. Nak cakap x pikir langsung, tu nak jadi bodoh namanya. Anyway, maybe my left and right brain hemisphere x defrag lagi. Example, yesterday aku gi membeli-belah di Giant. Reason is to buy stuff cam ration, produk2 kebersihan dan kecantikan dan apa-apalah yg aku teringin nak beli. Punyala malas nak pikir, aku main sauk je sabun cap DONA. Bila dah sampai umah, aku belek kotak sabun tu. Moment of silent kejap.....DONA??!! What the hell!!! Punya berbaris sabun2 berjenama seperti Dove, LUX, Dettol, etc., aku boleh amik sabun cap DONA. Still..... What The HELL??!!

Trademark kengkawan disini:

Yang Blur :
1. Yosh!
2. Chewah <--- this one act as a canceller.
Exp: "Ada duit nanti aku belanja korang makan, CHEWAH!"
Meaning: Dia xkan belanja.
3. Keep Up, Come On <--- The most annoying so far. Katanya, diambik dari Harry Potter
Pronounciation: With English tongue.
When: Sebelum nak keluar rumah gi kelas.

Yang Otaku :
1. Nandaiyo (Nan-dai-yok)
Translation: Something like "What!" (with attitude) in japanese language.
2. Few japanese phrases yang aku x dapat nak tangkap.
My reaction: "Whatever dude....."

Yang Layan Drama Jepun :
1. Macam mana ek
Meaning: Macam mana ek
2. Cam ni la.....
Exp: "Korang pegi makan x ajak, CAM NI LA...."

Yang Kacak Tapi Sebenarnya X Kacak :
1. Kacak Giler
Exp: "Ko punya handset ke ni? KACAK GILER"

Chapter 59 - My Philocoffee

Not long time ago, my fren gave me something to read about. It's an online journal of a person. Aku dah x ingat link dia. Something sound like 'outpost 9' or 'outpost 69' or whatever. Its a journal of a american teacher, teaching english somewhere in Japan. I didn't manage to finished it, sbb byk sgt post. But, journal dia so damn hilarious. Kawan aku ckp, "once you read it, it'll change your perspective of japanese people". Actually, aku kurang suprise dgn apa yang aku baca. I've kinda expected it.

Review of 'outpost 9' or whatever : About day-life of an american teacher in japan teaching english to kids. Budak2 dari first grade hingga ke middle school, sume dia penah ajar. Kids there know stuffs bout sex already. Even for budak2 first grade. Read it to believe it and laugh bout it.

Even after read for few posts and amazed by their pervert'ness, I'd still love Japan. I love their culture (not that I hate mine) and places over there. OK, maybe to much watching j-drama, but it didnt change the fact that I like there.

Speaking of J-drama, aku ada sorang housemate yang mudah dipengaruhi oleh citer2 jepun ni. Of course, kat umah ni aku la pembekal citer2 jepun, and he watched all the drama I recommended him to watch. Ada sekali tu aku bagi cerita 'kiwa wa petto' ( U R my pet ), he's been in a good mood for few days. Asked me to teach few japanese greetings and scream the hell out of it every his spare time. Which is kinda annoying but fun to layan. Before that, aku kasi cerita 'Hana yori dango' a.k.a meteor garden and he's been bragging bout going to Japan, DAILY! So few days ago, I gave him '1 liter of tears'. Trust me, It's a tear-jerking drama (read the review, you wont miss the word "tear-jerking"). Lagi sedih dari 'Summer Snow'. Since then, he's in a slump mood. Sulking bcos of the drama. Didnt concentrate in his class. TAK TIPU BEB! Hahahahaha........

Chapter 58 - One Head or Just You?

What type of fren do you prefer? The one yg sekepala or totally opposite with you? Can you define sekepala? For me, kawan "yang sekepala" bukanla kawan yang mempunyai minat yang sama dgn anda. They do not have the same interests with you. Kawan "yang sekepala" adalah kawan yg despise the same thing. X kesah la bende tu orang ke, cikgu ke, pemerintah ke, game ke; but most definitely, kawan anda yang lain. Perhatikan diri sendri dah cukup. Contohnya, 3 orang (A, B ngan C). 3 makhluk ni suka main bola (kira mempunyai minat yang sama), tapi A ngan B benci giler kat C sebab C perangai cam sial. A ngan B menyampah giler ngan C (despise the same thing). So, most of the time A and B hang-out, kutuk C blakang-blakang. So, A ngan B dikira sekepala. Tu je...

Aku nak kira kawan baik tu banyak.... kawan yg jahat tapi mulia pon ada.... tapi aku xleh handle kawan yang gelabah. Pikir sendri bagus. Xnak ngaku kalah dan salah. Pikir sendri bagus lagi. Angkat bakul, dalam bakul sendri juga ada. Meluat habis.... Xnak ngumpat la kat sini.

Tapi ada kes dulu ngan roomate member aku. Aku slalu lepak bilik member aku tu. Pastu satu hari ni aku perasan yang roomate dia tambat kerusi kat meja study dia. APA KEJADAHNYA... aku tanya member aku ni. Dia kata roomate dia ni selfish sket. Kira aku ngan member aku ni sekepala la..... So, 1 hari ni aku cakap kat roomate dia dalam nada bergurau, "pe cerita ikat kerusi ni?? nak alih x bleh la.... ko ni, jual ikan la....". Aku maksudkan jual ikan tu 'selfish'. Dia senyap jek, tapi mesti dalam hati dia kata,"Lebih la ni main nama bapak aku.... tau la bapak aku Embong". HAHAHAHAHHAAH.......Get it? Selfish = jual ikan = Embong = ikan Kembong. Jahat x jahat la aku....

Chapter 57 - Laptop, BZ, Tired

I swear i've never been this bz. So tired. With non-stop assignments, projects, presentations and shits, I can't sleep peacefully at night. Before i can shut these sexy pair of eye, I'll always think bout stuffs, worrying sick if i can't finish it in time. DAMN!! Lately i cant get any decent sleep. With morning classes..... absolutely tiring....

I "borrowed" my dad's laptop and upgraded it.
256 MB DRAM -> 768 MB DRAM
20 GB HD -> 60 GB HD
DVD ROM -> DVD burner

Of course after these xpensive upgrade, I wont give back this laptop to my dad. I can, but I wont. Nasib la....

Amirul Fahrin is almost 2 months old. Aku suka kejut baby tido. Best. Ye la...sementara masih boleh kacau.....

How to apply math in life:
statements
MRR2 retak lagi = jam la MRR2 = aku xleh balik ikut NKVE lagi sbb aku kena lalu situ nanti = Lebuh Mahameru brtambah bz = Samy Vellu sengal

conclusion
MRR2 retak jika dan hanya jika Samy Vellu sengal

Ada Apa Ngan Valentine Day
xde pape. Valentine day is for suckers. Luckily Im single. If (one day) my gfren asked to celebrate, aku akan bawa dia ke lorong-lorong belakang yang gelap... then heheheeheh...... kutip botol2 terbuang utk di-recycle. What else?

Chapter 56 - Flu

Hi. Definitely long time no see. Nothing much happened past 4 weeks. My classes as usual. Most bz is Tuesday and most not bz is Monday, Wednesday and Friday with only 1 class. Tu yang problem bila 1 hari 1 kelas. Otak belah kanan ni asyik pujuk nk ponteng je, but so far xde yg ponteng lg...."technically"..... except last Wednesday bila aku kena selsema which Im still having it now. Orang bleh mati sebab selsema tapi jarang orang mati sebab demam. Dalam kes ni kena la excuse'kan demam kepialu, demam denggi atau demam kuning. I mean, demam yg biasa2 je. For temporary (hopefully), nikmat rasa aku kena tarik kejap. Makan tu dah x rasa apa. I cant explain it scientifically cos Im not a scientist. Tapi...rasa x rasa, aku balun je. Makin kenyang aku, makin cepat sihat. Ceh, ni dah macam ular.

Chapter 55 - Crap Dealer

I've to deal with lots of crap. I hate crap. Dealing with it makes me feel like crap. But Im doing fine. I've learned thing or two. Doing my own laundry, hate it though. But as long it help me build some muscle, then it's ok. I think Im not strong. I need more muscles. I can't throw a 3-point ball without throwing my whole body. I need to jog more. My stamina sucks! With the upcoming bball tournament, I dont want to be sidelined because of my stamina. Ordinary people are advised to jog/exercise 20 minutes a day, and 3 times a week. That makes 60 minutes of exercise. I played bball for 1 hour 1/2 each time. Say that I played 4 times a week, so that makes 6 hours. So Im doing 600% more than I should. But that wont be count as Im not constantly running for that 6 hours. VBJDKSHhfaoi;gfsdfhsd;afi;us........... Blur.............. Sleepy....... Mengarut.......... Talking shit..............

Anyhoo..... I've got a housemate that crazy-love to spoil things by telling the outcome of animes or movies that Im watching..... I admit that I hate spoilers. Why he has to ruined everything by telling me things that I saved for last, which is the thrills and the unexpected ending. Yea....he is one of the crap Im dealing with.

Last month, I'd finished watching House season 1 and suddenly I want to be a doctor. Last week, I watched The Intepreter and suddenly I want to be UN Intepreter. Last friday, I watched Baik Punya Cilok and suddenly I want to go pancing ikan. I never doubt that television got power. Power to change, power to encouraged, power to touched, and whatever power i dont want to waste my time typing on it.

Oh... Crap is contagious. Fact of life...

Chapter 54 - Bring It On

Home alas.... It's great to be at home. New semester, new feeling, new motivation, new person. No complaint though. Oh yeah, except apsal harga minyak mahal ek? Walaupun ada subsidi dari kerajaan, aku still rasa mahal.

~Dasar x kenang jasa la kau ni~

"Ah, orang lain pon camni. Komplen harga minyak mahal padahal, negara jiran berebut2 seberang sempadan nak isi minyak Mesia. Minyak kat Mesia ni kira murah siot! Kena la ngan cost of living kat Mesia. Kalau nak bukak cerita pasal jurang ekonomi antara kaum + kedudukan geografi yg menyumbang kepada ketidakseimbangan taburan ekonomi, sampai esok x sudah. Dah la.... bayar je la."

~Ye la.... Takat subsidi 1.024 seliter baik xyah. Lebih la sket!~

"Banyak cekadak ko.... abis kalau duit kerajaan (yg merupakan duit rakyat) abih disalur kat situ, camne ekonomi nak berkembang. Bangunan x naik, jalan x turap. Pastu komplen lagi. Ah! Malas la nak cerita ngan orang yang x buta ekonomi ni. Baik korang masuk UiTM, dapat belajar ekonomi (x kira la course apa ko amik kat situ, semua WAJIB amik). At least berisi otak korang; ye la... daripada dok isi ngan gosip majalah mangga ngan URTV."

~Tapi UiTM x diiktiraf antara Universiti terbaik dunia... buat apa nak blajar kat situ. Lagipon bukan ke UiTM ni tmpt utk anak2 melayu yg x lepas nak blajar kat U yg lebih glemer kat Mesia ni.~

"1st of all, toksah gatal2 nak cari dalam senarai tu, memang xde. UiTM x boleh dimasuksenaraikan sebab UiTM bukan la U yg open. Meaning, bumiputra only. Inilah institusi yang nak menolong orang2 melayu dari zaman Tun Abdul Razak lagi. Kalau ko rajin cari orang gagal @ flunk @ menjahanamkan bangsa dari UiTM ni, mesti ko ada masa nak cari orang yang berjaya mengharumkan nama Mesia dan memajukan bangsa dan negara yg dtg dari UiTM. Ye la, nak kata UiTM ada pompuan bersalin anak haram dalam jamban, kat U lain pon ada. Nak kata UiTM ada rakaman blue, UM pon ada, UNITAR pon ada. Ah! UTM pon ada. Pendek kata semua U ada la..."

~Kalau cuma utk bumiputra, kenapa dalam kelas aku ada minah dari Maldives? Siap x leh cakap melayu lagi...~

"Eh, ko ni dak UiTM ke...? Pegi mampus la kau.... "

Ah...cerita pasal minyak, RM10 for my kancil can last for 3 days top (in Shah Alam only). So, apa cerita.... mana nak cekau duit. PTPTN x masuk lagi. Garu kepala........

Congratulation to my brader, Syam and sis in law for giving me a nephew. Damn cute boy named after my grandad, Amirul Fahrin Thambychek. Yea, my grandad's name is on the last part. Figure hows that gonna fit into IC... Anyway, siap la kau!! Apa yg abah kau buli aku masa aku kecik2 dulu akan kubalas padamu. Hahahaahahaha..... 26 Dec 05, 3.30 am, Hospital Selayang.

Chapter 53 - My Result Sucks!!!

Just found out my xm result yesterday. Kinda bad. Actually worse. I'm having this feeling of 'Jasin reLive' back. Well, I can say that the result came at really bad time as I'm going to ask my dad for sponsorship for my basketball team. Kept telling myself that things going out as planned, but who knows?? Well, as usual... I'm fully motivated to study as new semester creeping in closer. But 'as usual', It'll lost it in the middle of semester. Look what happened last semester. Talking bout having trouble waking up in the morning. But I'm really optimistic for this new semester. That is what I have put in mind. Telling my mom about the result IS bad, wait until I tell my dad; it worst! It's time to turn the tide! Chewah.....

My landlord already called me yesterday, asking bout december's rent. Gotta lie a bit. Mana nak cekau duit masa cuti2 ni? That's why aku mintak sblm cuti, tapi 2 orang je yg bayar. Hampas! PTPTN aku dah kering, ASB aku pon dah cecah tahap bahaya. Luckily, dah ada housemate yg offer diri nak bayar esok. Nampaknya cita2 utk beli graphic card baru bukanlah sekadar angan kosong....hahahaha

Baik Punya Cilok best! Jangan x tengok. Lawak yg fresh dan trademark dari Afdlin. Unlike Apek Senario nyer lawak yang gitu-gitu ntah hape-hape.... All the casts are tremendous and brilliant. Nice story line. Kira baik punya cilok la....

Chapter 52 - Due To Unavoidable Circumstances

Ah....it's been 39 days since my last post. Well, nothing much happened in my life. Abis xm bulan lepas, aku lepak rumah, menghabiskan beras, gula dan garam; petang2 nak main bball asyik hujan je. Cuma 3-4 hari lepas aku sakit perut, so most of my time I was sleeping or playing PS2. Kawan2 ajak main basket pon terpaksa reject. Anyway, these are about our local 'little' entertainment industry:

• Lagi artis kawin dengan duit. "Juliana Banos & Mokhtar Love Forever"?????, the correct would be, "Juliana Banos & Mokhtar Love For 3 Years".
• Lagi artis bercerai. Noraniza Idris vs Fareez. "Walaupun kami bercerai, tapi saya masih sayangkan Fareez" - Noraniza. My Ass!! Kalau sayang kenapa bercerai kak oi...
• Lagi artis pukul camera-man. No comment. Fazura sucks!
• Lagi artis hisap dadah. "Saya hisap dadah, saya bertaubat, berilah saya peluang kedua..." - Ameng. Biasanya yang mintak peluang kedua ni mesti akan mintak peluang ketiga. Ingat senang ke berenti hisap. X kira la hisap rokok ke, syabu ke, ice ke, gam ke, dadah ke....
• Lagi artis fantastic. Im looking forward for Afdlin new movie, Baik Punya Cilok. Awie ada, AC Mizal ada, Hans ada.... fantastic la mamat nih. Bulat dan fantastic.
• Lagi artis berlagak. "Saya x takut. Jangan tuduh saya fitnah Siti (mmg bukan saya yang buat tapi itu saya yang sruh) dan saya memang diserang depan bangunan TV3 (x tipu punya... tapi saya kena serang dgn diri sendiri la....)" - Kak Pah. Lagu kak mmg bleh tahan, tapi perangai kak tu yg xleh handle. Eh... Kak ke, patut pangkat Mak dah.....

I'm going to catch King Kong tonight with my fellow frens. Hopefully that movie wont give me much yawn as Hulk. Narnia and Harry Potter rock!!! Rock x rock la...sampai balik rumah tu aku terus download Harry Potter 5: Order of Pheonix ngan Harry Potter 6: Half-Blood prince. Layan seh!!!

Chapter 51 - My Oh My....

I did some changes in my blog. Not much or significance I can say. Just a mp3 player on the sidebar. But, due to the size of that mp3, probably your(and my) internet browser will take some(or a lot of) time to download it. So, we might hear lagu separuh-separuh. Cam Siot! Pasni aku nak cari software yang bleh edit mp3 dan reduce the size. It'll be pretty much convenience afterwards. Before this aku punya la cari file hosting yang bleh aku uploadkan mp3, turn out that most if it kena bayar or subscribe. Masa search tu semua describe "free", but there's nothing free in this world maa!! This particular file hosting pon aku dapat dari mana forum ntah. So, unless internet speed korang laju, mmg sakit hati jugak la nak dengar lagu nih.

You also can download the wallpaper by clicking on it. Think so.... (never try before). Oh yea, tomorrow is my first paper. All I need is double ME. While 'he' go take the exam, the real me is at home sleeping. Hahahah.... I wish!!! Actually, aku nih traume sket bila time exam besar2 nih. Kalau dulu(masa primary + secondary school), small matter pon aku exaggerate'kn. Nak explain camne pon payah. But soon, after studying in U, those habits of mine disperse. Still remember, masa sem III kat UTMKL, I'd miss my mathemathic exam. Guess what i'm doing at that moment? Basuh akuarium. Hahahaha(how I can laugh at this?!). Talking bout miss-read. The next day, dengan ilmu matematik pekat didada, aku melangkah kedalam dewan yang kosong. I was cuak to death bila tengok jadual xm. Turn out, I'm sitting for other paper on that day. Jawab je la walaupon haram x baca langsung. My closest fren(that time, not anymore...) bleh tanya, "Eh, ko kat mana semalam...tak nampak ko pon...". Dah tau tak nampak aku, bukan nak telepon. Kalau aku x datang hari tu, aku rasa sampai bila pon dia takkan tepon aku tanya kabar. Like what people said; That's what a fren for, destroying my life....

Masa Raya, pernah tak korang experience budak2 yang korang x pernah tengok @ kenal datang nak beraya tapi hakikatnya diorang cuma nak duit raya je.... Nak halau x sampai hati kan??... Ever think of a way to counter it? Ni sikit tips and hints:

> Bila dengar diorang datang, cepat2 tutup mulut and mute the damn TV. Stay camouflage. Kalau diorang bagi salam, jawab! (x jawab dosa!). Tapi jawab slow2. Turn yourself into whispering mode.
*Taktik ni x jadi bila pintu @ tingkap depan rumah korang terbuka luas. So, proceed to the next point...

> This method require capital a.k.a money. Sebelum Raya, beli sebiji rumah merah (price ranging from RM200 - RM1000++. Depend on quality), 3 biji oren dan sepeket colok. U know where this going to... Pagi raya, lepas sembahyang raya, pacakkan rumah merah kat depan rumah korang, letakkan 3 biji oren dan bakarkan colok.
*Although it'll cost u some money, but look at the bright side, u can use it every raya...

> Go to any supermarket, look for "BEWARE DOGS" or "DOGS:TRESPASSER WILL BE BITE TO DEATH" plaque. Hang it in front of your house. To make it super real, rent or buy a dog and chained it in front of your house. I mostly recommend Rottweiler.
* There're suggestions from my fren to use bear traps and electric fences. But I instantly wrote it off. I dont want to kill the kids, just to drive them away. So, I hope these guides will help u on the next raya.

Chapter 50 - How is....

Gosh, finally it's my 50th post. I love my blog. It's my world. I'd try to be JERKier than before. That's my promise.

Another gosh, finally it's Syawal. 30 days of fasting is so damn quick nowadays. Rasa cam semalam je start pose. With blinks of eyes, poof.. it's over already. Regretably, my terawikh were constantly decreases over this few years. Wonder why? StarWorld ada cerita best2 ke pkl 8 mlm? Setahu aku, I spent almost 2/3 Ramadhan at Shah Alam, which NO tv apatah lagi Astro. Study? Hmpfh...it's a rare sight to see me study. So, pe masalahnya? So I decide to leave it till next Ramadhan. Maybe I'll get my answer by then. Skarang Raya dulu...

Speaking of Raya, I'm positive as hell that I met less my relatives that last Syawal. After semayang Raya, I slept until 4 pm (I didn't sleep the night before. Damn Man U ~ kalah lagi!), then went to my mak long's house at Bangsar which I tried to avoid each year but never gonna happen. I like my mak long, but I hate my pak long. Snobbish rich guy. You guys probably curse me for hating my own uncle and that'll automatically curse most of my cousins (yeah, they hate him as well). The HELL I care! Meet him before you can criticize me. But dont get me wrong fellas, I hate him, but I dont wish him to be hit by lorry simen and die.... Just being hit by that lorry is enough already. Thankfully, the angpau was good. Then I went to my aunt's house in PJ until maghrib. Pastu balik umah tengok tv. That's what Raya is all about, TV!! thn ni ada 5 channel, next year who knows.. Lenguh mata nak tengok. But I didnt fall for that, instead I watched downloaded anime on my dad's PC. Straight for 4 days I didnt shut my dad's PC. Jangan meletup sudah... Ah, 3 am and Im at Shah Alam. Yeah, you read it right! Raya kedua and I already here in Shah Alam. But I have to head home tomorrow for big family dinner. Asal percuma, aku x kesah!! hahahaha....

Where's all the mercun's merchant? The santa claus of Syawal. Dulu senang je carik and as I recall, my favorite stall was at tepi kubur dalam Kampung Changkat. Though aku mercun'holic masa kecik2 dulu, xde la main sampai putus jari, tangan dan kepala. The worst pon aku hangus kulit tangan. Agaknya aku x cukup adventurous kot. Tapi tahniah la kepada kanak2 yang mengalami kecelakaan bermain mercun. At least they challenged themselves to up the standard of playing mercun or create new method of playing mercun.

Chow.

Chapter 49 - Another Disappointment

Sigh....Another disappointing weekend. Man U still unable to resolve their finishing problem. Star dah bersepah dalam team but still can't grab the 3 points away. Orang kutuk camne pon, Im still their die hard fan. Im start to doubt Fergie's credibility as the manager. But the blame shouldn't be put on his sole shoulder, as the players too should be more energetic and sharp. With Ronaldo's recent rape accusation, it surely gonna bring down it's rep. Why........ WHY.....?!!!!!


Che Guevara is a well known name especially for youngster that kept wearing T with it's face printed on it but yet can't explain to me, who the hell is Che Guevara. Probably a cheap RM15 T they bought at bundle shop and it's sickening me that these kids wore without knowing. I once asked one of my fren who wore Che's T, and he even can't tell me where Che from. It's not that Im against them wearing Che's T, but at least get to know the person whose face printed DAMN LARGE on it. Let me give some scoop on it. He was Fidel Castro right man back in Cuba when Fidel started the revolutionary movement during the 60's. He too, like Fidel, full of charisma and also petah berkata-kata. But it is impossible to have 2 captain in a boat. So he went to Bolivia in hope to foment the revolutionary movement there, but luck is out of his hand when Brehnez took over Soviet and demand Fidel to stop messing with other country's affair.
Basically, Fidel cut their communication as Che + 22 comrades was chased by CIA (nice going Fidel!). He was then captured by Bolivian Army and was killed the day after. Tough luck huh! He is considered as a hero of 3rd world socialist revolutionary movements. What a legacy for a dead person?!. So, at least you now know who the hell is he. Hmm... Im afraid the lack of curiosity in yougsters these day might lead to something worst. For example, they might wear T with Ariel Sharon face on with thought that it might look cool but not knowing that he is the most evil creature walking on this beautiful earth. Damn Kids....oh, not to forget, Damn you Ariel Sharon....

Chapter 48 - The Longest 4 Hours

Hahaha....Surely Im not good at bragging. Few post before, I'd kick Ust. Din out of my link list for not updating his blog, but here im doing it. Hahahahah. Well, what can I say... blogging require mood. No mood, no ilham, if no ilham datang berduyun-duyun, then Im going to write something merapu which even I gonna kick myself up. So, ask this...am I in a mood now. Nah.. Just doing what Im suppose to do, which is merapu. Hehehehe....

Ah,banyak plak nyamuk kat umah nih. How Im gonna type with both of my hand in action (a.k.a menepuk nyamuk). I should bought aerosol on my way home. To be exact, I used it all last week when cencorot(some kind of tikus) infiltrate my house. Damn! I hate rats, roaches, and all sort of insects. So, practically I depleted the whole can of aerosol just to spray at that stupid cencorot. Unfortunately, he's still alive. How possible is that. Super rat or what?!! I partly blamed the failure to exterminate that damn cencorot to Belang (my cat, don't ask!).

The morale of the story from paragraph above is to inform that Im home. Study leave + Raya holiday. This year is the first I spend most of Ramadhan away from home. Senang cerita kat Shah Alam la... Even I'm going back there the day after tomorrow coz ada online test. What a week! I missed my important presentation + late of report submission + lack of attendance. Camne lecturer aku nak tolong ni?! If I'm in his leather shoe, surely Im gonna fail that kind of student. Aku dah give up pon, but thinking of my innocent partner, I pushed myself to complete the report and submit 2 days after the deadline. Dengan wall-face nyer, me and my partner went to see him. From11 o'clock, until 2.15 pm we waited in front of his office, not to mention that I didnt sleep the night before, so Im pretty much mereng. After explained stuff, which I bet he didnt believe at all, we waited for another 45 minutes for other group's presentation. Thankfully, he did accept our report but still considering to give us second chance for our presentation. Lantak arr....

Im pretty messed up this semester. Lack of motivation. Orang kata sebab xde awek. Ye ke?? Ntah arr... My horoscope reading for this week said that Im gonna annoy my frens if Im not going to change my attitude. What can I say, I like to make frens as well as annoy them. Torture if possible. Also, during this Ramadhan, I'd developed this sleeping disorder, which make me more likely a bat than human. Sleep after Subuh and wake up around 2 - 3 pm. The bad thing is, I missed some of my morning as well as afternoon classes. But the good thing is, I feel hungry for 4 hours only. Hahahhaa..... Yesterday, I broke the current record of 3 p.m when I woke at 3.15 p.m. Im so proud of myself. But Im just a rookie compared to my other frens in seksyen 6. They can go all the way to late night. Binatang ke hape??

So, that's covered for 2-3 weeks rite? Puas hati aku dapat update. Hahahhhahaah

Chapter 47 - Already??

What is the odd of watching 2 hours of boring ghost story in the middle of the night with your frens? pretty slim huh.. but it happened to me last night. Actually it's not 'happened', but more likely 'doing it', but I'm totally embarassed to admit that. Anyway, the name of the story is BUPPAHRAHTRE. Yep, it's Thai's ghost story. My fren kept insist that this is a hell of scary movie. Yeah, it's scary enough to make 5 years old wet their bed. The story of a boring, unsocialized, top student of her class who fell in love with this jerk. It turned out that this jerk made a bet with his jerk frens to score her for a bottle of wine. You know the rest...bla, bla, bla...the girl got pregnant, suicide, become a ghost. A funny one to be exact. Sigh... a top student who fell in love can become someone stupid as hell. Dont watch it!

I hate hypocrite people that afraid to admit their hypocritism. Cmon, EVERYONE are hypocrite. They just don't realize that. It is bad to admit one? Nope. In fact, I like being hypocrite. That's what I am. I often read bout some of our artists/actresses/actors who hate hypocrite people. Yeah, bite my shining metal ass. They're the biggest hypocrite ever. Dont get me wrong. Hypocrite is good, but not to admit it, you are stupid! Since everbody is becoming one, why dont they put "everyone" in their dislike column?! It got the same meaning with hypocrite. They might as well save some ink to print the extra letter.

Chapter 46 - Bored To Death

Just a hi won't do any harm. Figure that's pretty much of a welcoming speech. Bless who created that. Nothing much happened, just sometime feel bored and irritated with the assignments and stuff. Bet there's ton of stuff that make you happy as well as annoyed. Yeah, figured that out lately. I would like to list the "10 things I hate bout you", but I'm not in the mood. Just to give some sneak preview to it, I hate ugly people watching me eating. How's that? Nope, I'm not in the good looking human clan, but damn sure I'm not in the ugly one. As I'm saying, why bother staring at me while I'm eating. Nothing better to do 'ke'? I might be wrong. He/she might staring at the chair behind me while getting horny bout it. Please, get a room!

I was hoping of becoming a doctor when I'm 15. Guess it's not going to happen. But lately, "if" had infected my brain. Not some kind of illness. Just a simple usage of my brain that processing imagination and stuff. What if I score my biology paper during high school. Study damn hard that I get 3.50 above for my cgpa. Offered a scholarship to study in Australia, UK or wherever that snow once in a year, I don't care. Doing double degree and open up my own practice. I'm sure gonna look cool. Maybe because I watched too many 'scrubs' or 'House', or maybe I look good on white coat, and definitely the thought that I can dig up chick easily. But it's impossible since I didn't score my biology, didn't get 3.50 above since I thought that 2 would look less curly than 3 on my certificate, and I missed the big flyer on newspaper buzzing bout JPA interview. Yeah, it's 3' x 3' big. Psft...no wonder I missed it. Double degree? I'm still busting my ass to get my single degree. Reality sucks but it's ok. I thought that I can be a doctor, but in my case, I'll be treating computers though screwdriver look much less cool than scaple.

Chapter 45 - My First Review

Announcing my first review of a play. First time in my history, I went to see a play last saturday. Well, I had to choose whether to go to the play or to my aunt's tahlil. Easy one. I chose to watch the play over tahlil bcos I can meet up with my OC frens (Not that 'Orange County' one, but my OverSea frens), plus, my fren (syazli) is one of the cast and it's much more fun. Woke up at 8 pm, called my mom to tell her that I'm not going to the tahlil with excuse of tired after playing bball for my faculty early that day. Yeah, It's true what!!!! So this is the damn review:

Title: Pelajar

Cast: Syazli and some fellas I don't want to know

Characters: (my rate system is based on "how much I want to punch him/her and where")
Student - the unbelievable 'not so clever' student (played by syazli)
- every 8-10 seconds this fella kept checking on his lecturer's ass and
boobs except for the last 2 minutes of the play bcos he's dead (just like I wish).
- he know what is capital of France, he know 1 digit addition arithmetic, but hell he
don't know 4 minus 3.
- Rating: At first I want to punch him hard on the face, but after seing him dead, I just
want to punch him less hard, still in the face.

Husbands - the unbelievable duff husband
- He's the first to come out on the play and I'm already hate him.
- He's the man of the house, the dog of it's own yard, but he didn't realize there's 40
coffins in his backyard. Idiot.
- Rating: I want to sucker punch him.

Wife/lecturer - the unbelievable psycho person
- She's wack. Not that 'whack' wack, just wack.
- one time, she's holding pen, the next second she's got parang on her hand.
- teaching arithmetic, filology and literature for dummies.
- hobby: kill her student after giving one or two speech of filology.
- Rating: I want give her clothline from hell right on the throat. That'll send her
straight to asylum.

Maid - the unbelievable annoying maid/amah
- for some reason, she hate filology.
- She cleaned corpse more than cleaning the house.
- Like to jaga tepi kain orang
- Rating: Punch her in her ribs

butler - the unbelievable annoying butler
- hobby: ripped off/smug dead people.
- Hate him
- Hate him
- Rating: Definitely a low blow in you know where.

clock - the superbly annoying retardly clock
- He's kinda live 'unliving' object which is witness to all things happened in the house.
- A clock that wore ring, round clock hanging from his neck and glitter on his face. Unreal.
- Once in the while, he will wake from his chair and talk. How annoying is that.
- Definitely Hate Him
- Thankfully, the clock die in the end. I don't know how possible is that, and I don't care as
long as he's dead.
- Rating: a poke in the eye, a slash on his throat then give him a 'stone cold steve austin'
stunner. Then give him a wall of jericho when he's on the ground.

new student - the superbly kawaii girl
- the thing that made me less hate this play is bcos of this girl. CuTe~~~
- Rating: Wanna kiss her right on the cheek

Sum of Story(chronologically): A student going to take his phd exam - meet this lecturer for extra tuiton - try to ngorat his lecturer so she might help him on the exam - first lesson; arithmetic which most of the time the lecturer try to teach her dead-stupid student of 4 minus 3 calculation (BORING!!) - the student kept emphasizing the word 'batang' and 'besar' (what a jackass)- Lecturer decided to move on to the next lesson; filology - amah come in to warn the lecturer not to teach filology but get scolded instead - suddenly the student having a toothaches - Lecturer bring out the parang - slice here and there - stabbed him - realize what she had done - cry - cry again - amah came in, consoled her and clean up the mess - stabbed the clock - the end

Overall: Entertainably boring.